Tuscany senior living scottsdale

Me (21,M) and my ex girlfriend (19,F) are attempting to get back together, we started dating again about a week ago after talking for about 2 months again, things have been going really well, my birthday just passed and she spent all week with me, the only issue we’ve been running into is when I ask her about her past, now she has made it clear she doesn’t want to talk about it, but me being the man I am and loving to hurt, I ask anyways and even though she does not want to talk about it she does, (some back story) we met in high school when she was a freshman and I was a junior, we hung out the summer between her sophomore year and my senior year, we spent almost everyday together within a friend group we had, but it didn’t work out, she actually dated a guy (my arch nemesis) in a spiteful manner to get back at me for getting a blow job from one of her friends, we still liked each other though and kept in small contact whenever we could, eventually at the beginning of 2020 when Covid happened it was my senior year and school and all got cancelled, being away from everyone we reconnected and and started talking for months before starting to date in may of 2020, we dated for a little while and we had our ups and downs, she was 16 I was 18 she was still kid and I was trying to grow up, eventually near the end of February of 2021 we decided to take a week break and I decided at the end I wasn’t going to get back with her, we split off and as the memes go I was ok at first and she wasn’t, but the script quickly flipped and I found myself in a world of pain while she had taken her time and gotten over things, she informed me that she had sex with 2 of the guys I “shouldn’t be worried about” who ultimately caused our breakup in the first place, this was within the first 2 months of us breaking up, I had already had fun of my own but it wasn’t with anyone who interfered with our relationship, so this news made me very upset, we had nasty words with each other and went out separate ways, again we had light contact and saw each other a few times throughout the last 2 years occasionally hooking up but not discussing anything in our personal lives, she graduated summer 2022 and went off to college about 2 hours away, while I stayed in our home town working, about 5 months ago we really stared talking again and realized we missed each other at the end of April I went up to her college to see her and we had a great time, it’s now June 2023 and we are dating again, she has slowly revealed things she had done in our 2 years apart, and every once in a while I pry at her and get more info on all the guys she slept with and how many times and when , all this information hurts me but I can’t help myself, although it is in a way helping me get over it, but she hates it when I bring stuff up and ask her about it, but I just can’t help myself, this is causing a strain on my relationship but I don’t think I can stop asking until I’m fully over it and I tried to explain that to her, she slept with 11+ people in 2 years, I was originally her 3rd sexual partner, it bothers me and makes me feel insecure and I just don’t know how to move forward or how to get over it, sorry for the long explanation, just please give me some advice.

Good evening everyone!
Trying this again in hopes of getting a consistent chat, 2nd times a charm! I'm here today hoping to find a genuine connection, or dating with a purpose. I've been through the ringer over the last 15 years or so, but I want to get back up on that horse and find my last relationship. I'd like to find someone who believes in having fun in life and is glass half full! Someone who likes to go on random adventures and likes to travel. Someone who can appreciate a guy who knows how to be respectful and treat a woman correctly, not be a thirsty boi lol. I'm not too picky on where you live, that's what planes are for and I like to travel! I don't mind if you have kids, I do not have any of my own, but not for lack of wanting them. I have a bunch of different interests and hobbies, would love to find someone who shares some of them!
A bit about me: 35 years old (Libra). Live in Georgia but I'm a Wisconsin native. I have 3 dogs, 2 senior dogs and a 6 month old Pittie puppy(ask for puppy pictures, she's just about the cutest dog ever. Or let's go on a doggie date!). I'm a gearhead and love any/everything about cars. I like just about all music. Very big about energy. Glass half full. Fun loving. Love to make people laugh and smile. Love to travel and go on road trips. Love to play video games(and hope you do too! I love playing video games with someone!) I enjoy hiking and kayaking. Always called a great guy or the nice guy(a blessing and a curse) I like to cook!
Here's a few pictures of me for reference:
https://imgur.com/a/5GEcJh2
https://imgur.com/a/OboSMIW
Puppy picture: https://imgur.com/a/MnEdiLK
If you made it this far, thank you so much for reading all the way through. Hoping this catches someone's eye and get some positive chats and a genuine connection. Have a great day and talk to you soon!

Sorry for this being so long - I'm an anxious person and I have way too much going on in my head, lol. BTW this is a random username and I'm going to keep things pretty vague, I don't want people to know it's me.
I currently work in government in a STEM field, where I am at the senior level and make good money. Benefits are spectacular, I'm represented by a union, and overall I love my job - I have an incredible supervisor who supports me, great team, and receive OT. The only thing I don't like about my current workplace is the upper management - they're kind people, but they make bad decisions and us employees are always basically crawling through mud to reach the finish line for everything.
The problem is I don't like where I live. I have no family here, neither does my partner (btw, my partner is fully remote and can live anywhere.) I've lived here for a really long time and feel ready for a change. I have a lot of friends and some extended family in Southern CA so I decided why not look and see what's out there. I got a job offer, and this company seems really great - benefits are good and the glassdoor ratings are off the charts. However, the pay cut would be about $30k considering the state I currently live in does not have a state income tax. Also, the job itself - I know I would be good at it because I already do it as part of my current job, but I ultimately want to shift my career in a different direction (still slightly related, it would be a shift towards health and safety) and I would not have the opportunity to do that here. In my current work place, my supervisor has me doing more safety-related things to boost my resume and get me closer to my goals of certification.
I'm struggling because I really want to move, but at the same time I'm worried about a few things:
-Potential recession/layoffs. Private industry worries me because there could be a chance of layoffs if a recession hit...but I also don't know if that would happen, I'm just speculating. There is no way I would be laid off from my current position if a recession occurred.
-Paycut: I don't have kids, but I do have some debt and I would like to be able to continue paying that off + putting money into savings. I know I'd need to budget better, which is 100% fine. I'm more thinking about what kind of setback taking a cut in pay would have on future opportunities down the road.
Am I being crazy?

Me (21,M) and my ex girlfriend (19,F) are attempting to get back together, we started dating again about a week ago after talking for about 2 months again, things have been going really well, my birthday just passed and she spent all week with me, the only issue we’ve been running into is when I ask her about her past, now she has made it clear she doesn’t want to talk about it, but me being the man I am and loving to hurt, I ask anyways and even though she does not want to talk about it she does, (some back story) we met in high school when she was a freshman and I was a junior, we hung out the summer between her sophomore year and my senior year, we spent almost everyday together within a friend group we had, but it didn’t work out, she actually dated a guy (my arch nemesis) in a spiteful manner to get back at me for getting a blow job from one of her friends, we still liked each other though and kept in small contact whenever we could, eventually at the beginning of 2020 when Covid happened it was my senior year and school and all got cancelled, being away from everyone we reconnected and and started talking for months before starting to date in may of 2020, we dated for a little while and we had our ups and downs, she was 16 I was 18 she was still kid and I was trying to grow up, eventually near the end of February of 2021 we decided to take a week break and I decided at the end I wasn’t going to get back with her, we split off and as the memes go I was ok at first and she wasn’t, but the script quickly flipped and I found myself in a world of pain while she had taken her time and gotten over things, she informed me that she had sex with 2 of the guys I “shouldn’t be worried about” who ultimately caused our breakup in the first place, this was within the first 2 months of us breaking up, I had already had fun of my own but it wasn’t with anyone who interfered with our relationship, so this news made me very upset, we had nasty words with each other and went out separate ways, again we had light contact and saw each other a few times throughout the last 2 years occasionally hooking up but not discussing anything in our personal lives, she graduated summer 2022 and went off to college about 2 hours away, while I stayed in our home town working, about 5 months ago we really stared talking again and realized we missed each other at the end of April I went up to her college to see her and we had a great time, it’s now June 2023 and we are dating again, she has slowly revealed things she had done in our 2 years apart, and every once in a while I pry at her and get more info on all the guys she slept with and how many times and when , all this information hurts me but I can’t help myself, although it is in a way helping me get over it, but she hates it when I bring stuff up and ask her about it, but I just can’t help myself, this is causing a strain on my relationship but I don’t think I can stop asking until I’m fully over it and I tried to explain that to her, she slept with 11+ people in 2 years, I was originally her 3rd sexual partner, it bothers me and makes me feel insecure and I just don’t know how to move forward or how to get over it, sorry for the long explanation. Should I keep trying to make it work?

The stray my s/o rescued from downtown has to go. Not only can I not deal with loud meows from 11:30pm- 4am. I’ve also stepped in his poop before because he shits outside his litter. Somehow he’ll shut the door to get in the litter room and shits on the floor. He scratch me while trying to do laundry. Still wearing bandages on my thumb. He doesn’t like being pet but will rub his stank butt all over you. After attacking me he went in time out to the litter room, once let out he pissed on my living room carpet. I’m trying to conceive and I don’t want this dirty untamed cat in my home. Mind you I have a senior cat and she behaves just fine. No animal even if it wasn’t a cat is worth this. I just needed to vent.

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is u/BayWindowBitch. She posted in AmItheAsshole
Trigger Warning: abandonment
Mood Spoiler: sad
Original Post: April 9, 2023
I (17 F) haven’t had a relationship with my dad since I was 8 years old. It broke me when my dad left bc it wasn’t just him, I lost my aunts/uncles, cousins, grandparents, they all stop talking to me. I’ve been in therapy since I was 11, I worked out a lot of my issues about my dad. My mother remarried when I was 7, I have a stepdad and 2 brothers I love very much. I am applying to colleges, an feel happier then I ever have. 3 weeks ago I got a call from my dad, he told me he was engaged, he was getting married in the fall, he wanted me to come to a reunion so they can get to know each other’s family, an I can get to know my new siblings. He said she wanted to meet his kids before they got married. (My father has 3 kids. Me, my brother and sister. I have a relationship with my sister, but we’re not close bc she lives far away.)
I hung up, I couldn’t deal with it I was emotional, an I bawled my eyes out. The next day I called my dad, I told him I had no interest in meeting his new family, that he was cruel for abandoning an 8 year old, even more cruel for reaching out bc he was forced to do so, I already had a family I was happy an secure with an I had no interest in him being in my life bc he was no longer my dad, and to not contact me.
I called my sister to ask if he reached out to her, he did, an she was going to go. I told her the conversation, she said what I said was appropriate bc it was true but I could’ve been nicer about it. I was a bit sad, but my family was there to comfort me. My sister sent me a link to a FB post that my new stepmother had shared, saying she couldn’t believe that “A perfect man could have such terrible children” My sister told me she was not going to go to the reunion bc she agreed she didn’t want to meet this woman after what she said about us.
I thought that would be the end of it an though that post upset me, I tried to let it go, but I started getting calls from my fathers side of the family, even my brother, telling me I was a bitch, an asshole for ruining the reunion by telling my dad he wasn’t my dad. They told me that he canceled the whole thing an he was questioning whether he should get married at all. They told me I could’ve reached out, it wasn’t fair they were being the ones blamed for the falling out. I have since blocked them, I did see a post on FB saying my dad postponed his wedding. But now I can’t stop thinking about what they said. I mean, yes, I could’ve reached out but I feel that’s not fair bc I was 8 I shouldn’t have to be the one that makes amends.
I know that I was harsh an could’ve gone about telling him I didn’t want him in my life a nicer way, but I don’t think I did anything wrong, maybe that’s bc everybody around me is taking my side. I’ve had multiple people tell me I’m an asshole, I feel guilty an I want an outside perspective.
AITA?
Edit: I just want to add some stuff. My sister is 23, my brother is 28. my mother had nothing to do with my family cutting me out. 2 years ago, I called my dad under the advice of my therapist, when he answered, I started crying and he didn’t say anything he just hung up on me, I think that’s when I really moved on from my dad.
Relevant Comments:
Therapy and brother relationship:
"Hello! Thanks for your kind words! I am currently still in therapy, I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon and I know that I need it and it benefits me in more ways than one. I am my mothers only biological child, she has said that I should cut ties with my brother. I have also been talking to my sister quite a bit today about what to do about our brother we only share DNA from our dad the same as I do with my sister, she says that I need to cut ties with him completely as well but at the same time I do feel bad because he went through the same abandonment that I did. It’s just my dad actually came back to him. Where as he didn’t come back to me or my sister. As of right now I haven’t cut ties not officially anyway with my brother, but it does seem like that’s where it’s headed."
What on earth did he tell his family when he stopped talking to you?
"Idk what he told his family or his fiancé, but when I started building a relationship with my sister, he did tell my sisters mother that my mother had filed a restraining order against him and that was the reason that he couldn’t be around me, which was 100% not true."
"I can assure you, there was never a restraining order filed. My sister’s mother figured that out an when she talked to my father about it, he admitted that he lied."
About the timeline of her parents' marriage:
"My parents got divorced when I was 2, for the next 5 years I would go back-and-forth from my mom to my dad’s house, over the last 2 years that I had a relationship with my dad, those visits went from every weekend to every other weekend to once a month to every other month and then there was nothing from my dad or any of his family one day they just stopped talking to me, about three months after my father had not come pick me up for his annual visitation, my mothers took me to his house, and we found out that he had moved back to Mississippi where his family was from. After that we never talked again until I was around 12 and he called me to tell me happy birthday, he called me one more time the same year to say merry Christmas, after that, I didn’t hear from him again until three weeks ago when he called me."
"My dad was such a jealous freak, like to the point where he would be mad when she went to work, there was this guy that my mother worked with, and he was super jealous of him, and one day he finally just accused her of cheating, and she said she didn’t cheat and he didn’t believe her and he left and then he came home. The next day and he admitted to having sex with another woman and then they got divorced, about two years later my mom started a new job and she ended up dating her boss and they got married when I was seven and now he’s my stepdad, but I also only hear my parents side of the story. I’ve never heard my dad side of the story. He’s never really thought it was important enough to tell me his side of the story, but that’s what I know of the whole situation, I really don’t know the true story because I was 2 when everything happened and me and my dad were never really close, he never told me like important things about his life, we didn’t talk much when I was with my dad, I mostly spent the time with his boyfriend."
Dad's messed up marriages:
"Me and my siblings all have different mothers. My father has been married 4 times. If he does marry this woman, this will be his fifth marriage. I didn’t even know of my sisters existence until I was 9 years old, my sister’s mother reached out to my mother when she noticed that her daughters child support had gone down because my father, wasn’t meeting his mandatory visitation rights and had to pay more child support towards me. The court told my sisters mother that he had two other children, and she reached out to my mother. We had dinner together, she also reached out to my brothers mother, but they had no interest in knowing my sister. I don’t know if my father has other children as far as I’m aware he doesn’t, but he lied to me and my brother about my sister and he lied to my mother about the existence of my brother before she had me so honestly, who knows but I do know that his fiancé has children between the ages of I believe 3 - 19."
What the heck did he say to you on the phone?
"The way I remember the conversation going was him, saying “hello this is so-and-so I just wanted to let you know that I’m having this family reunion because recently I got engaged and I’m gonna be getting married in the fall and I was hoping that you would be interested in coming to the reunion, your brothers going to be there, as well as the rest of my family And you can meet my fiancé and your new step-siblings.” that’s not exactly Word for Word, but that is the gist of the conversation. And no, he did not apologize. When I called him back the next day, he actually sounded quite mad that I hung up on him in the first place, and he said relatively the same thing, just in a harsh tone with fewer words. And that’s when I told him that I didn’t want to meet his family. He called me about 40 times after I hung up over the course of the next two days."
OOP is voted NTA
Update (Same Post): End of April
Update: I’ve talked to my dad and his fiancé, I told her everything about everything, they’re wedding was off for 11 days but now it’s back on, she didn’t really say much to me about it she mostly just brushed past it. They want to come out here (we’re I live) an have dinner with me an my mom. My sister has also agreed to come to the dinner but now he’s talking about coming to stay with him for a little while, an I don’t want to do that, I’m a little nervous about the whole thing now an I just don’t wanna start another dance with my father that ends badly for me.
Relevant Comment:
"I don’t plan on going to the wedding or any other events that include my dad after the dinner, the only reason that I agree to go to the dinner, was because my sister asked me not because he asked me. I don’t have any interest in having a relationship with my dad, but I do think that it would be healthy if I didn’t have any hatred for my dad, I don’t wanna be in this limbo where I just feel shitty for the rest of my life because I Have hatred toward my dad and I felt like this was an easier way to just deal with it and move on and let it go."
Update 2 (Same Post): May 25, 2023 (1.5 months from OG post)
Final Update:
I had dinner with my father and his new fiancé, as well as her children on the 18th of May. I feel like I got a lot of childhood feelings off of myself, I explained to my father, his fiancé, and her family why I felt the way that I felt as well as my reasoning for not wanting to come. I told him that I had no intentions of being in his life over the necessary amount. My dad did ask me quite a couple times if I was going to be up to go to the wedding, I did agree to go, but I made it clear that I don’t want to be involved as an official member in his life, more so someone he might see around the holidays, birthdays, or special events, but other than that I have no intentions of seeing or interacting with him. He seemed fine with that, and it was a perfect solution for me.
I’ve been told by many of you, as well as people in my personal life, that I should just cut him out of my life and move on. I just feel that having unresolved feelings is unhealthy, not having answers to things that you could have answers seems Kind of ridiculous if you have the option to get the answers that you want. My relationship with my father is never going to be great. It’s never gonna be perfect. It’s probably never going to be anything other than OK because I don’t really think I can see him as anything other than a deadbeat dad but I’m gonna try my best to be civil, a because I don’t want to have any more unresolved feelings with anybody else.
I know that it’s been over a month since my last update, but during that time I finished my senior year with 4 B’s and 4 A’s. I turned 18 on 21st of May. I graduated high-school and started a new job. It’s been a pretty busy month and so honestly I wasn’t even nervous about talking to my father because I felt like it was just so busy that it was just another thing to do but I’m glad it’s over and done with and I can move on with my life.

(from our job posting)
TITLE: Sr. Helpdesk Technician
Do you thrive in the field of IT, solving complex problems, and ensuring seamless tech operations? If so, we have an opportunity for you. Our Managed Service Provider (MSP) company is looking for a seasoned Senior Helpdesk Technician to strengthen our team of professionals. We're 6 person based MSP in the heart of Burbank, CA, and we value local talent to contribute to our ongoing success. Job Requirements: MSP Experience: Prior work in an MSP environment is essential for understanding our unique, fast-paced setting. Office 365 administration: Proficiency in this area is required, as it forms a critical part of our service portfolio. Windows & MAC OS Desktop: We need a candidate comfortable with this platform, with a track record to back it up. VMWare: Our operations require solid experience with VMWare. MSP tool stacks: Familiarity with key MSP tools is non-negotiable for this role. Firewalls: Particularly SonicWall and Fortinet. We count on our helpdesk to maintain robust defenses for our clients' systems. Location and Mobility: Candidates should live near Burbank, CA, and have reliable transportation for occasional onsite support. Customer Service and Teamwork: Outstanding phone-based customer service and a commitment to teamwork are vital for success in this role. Troubleshooting & Documentation: This role requires strong troubleshooting skills, a relentless approach to task completion, and rigorous attention to detail in documenting all actions taken.
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A MUST: Trust that you are going to fix the issues. No 2nd guesses. You'll ask if you have questions. Just an honest and straight forward approach. Someone we can trust to be there and get job done and cleanly. Experience: Candidates should have a minimum of 5-8 years in a similar MSP role and an ongoing commitment to professional development. What we offer: A hybrid work setup, blending remote work with occasional onsite assistance. A supportive, team-oriented environment that promotes personal and professional growth. A competitive starting salary of $73,000 to $80,000, with the potential for bonuses and raises. A comprehensive benefits package, including full medical, vision, vacation, and an opportunity to contribute to a 401k. If you're a problem-solver who sees IT challenges as opportunities to learn and grow, and you're ready to bring your expertise to a team of dedicated professionals, we invite you to apply. Eligibility to work in the USA is required. If this opportunity matches with your career goals and experience, please submit your application today. We look forward to potentially welcoming you to our team. - Please DM me if your interested.

Would anybody be interested in hearing my experience with this family? In full transparency I worked for them in Kristine’s in home daycare prior to Natalia being in the picture. It was in 2003-2004 so I know it’s been awhile. But I will never forget that family and now uneasy Kristine made me and my friend feel.
We were both seniors in high school and worked at her daycare Monday-Friday after we got out of school. And then full time in the summer.
I’m originally from Carmel, Indiana which is also in Hamilton County (where the Barnetts lived in Westfield)
Anyways I didn’t wanna make a long by winded posts if ppl were not interested since some time has passed.
Please let me know!

I met the "perfect" girl 40 years ago my senior year of university. Not bragging, but she was quite a stunner. People would stop talking when she walked into a bar or room, guys would try to act cool and suck in their bellies, girls would give "the look" to each other. She was a lifeguard in Socal, played several sports, was the color of fine browned bread and Jewish to top it all off. I'm not Jewish, but for some reason dated many many Jewish girls. This was the most I have every felt for anther human being, nothing has come close in all the years since.
Had a wonderful last semester then I graduated. She was a few years behind me and transferred to a different uni back West. I went out to find my way in the world, but soon fell into mental health problems that were waiting in the wings most of my life. Drinking was out of control when I was 15 and now I was in the real world and my brain of darkness and the booze were doing a number.
Anyway we stayed in touch, and a few years later we got together in NY. I was crashing, and she was not happy that I wasn't happy and the night was a short one. She left and I never saw her again. We wrote to each other, but I stopped answering her letters in the late 80s, too painful.
Good news is I got sober, got medical help for depression and started a new career. I would think of her every morning, wonder what she was doing, how she was. that went on until I was 55 years old. Social media I don't use, but I did find her address and I wrote a letter about my life. No question for her, just what had gone on in the past 30 years. I didn't put my return address on it, just sent it - that was that.
Two years go by and one day mail comes and there is a letter in a script that I remember. I teared up immediately and threw the letter in a cupboard. After a couple weeks I opened it. It was nice, asked a lot of questions, told me about her children and their colleges.
Something changed in my that month, I stopped thinking about her every morning. I realized that our time was not so special to her as it was to me. Or maybe that feeling just died in her 30 years ago. The good thing was I stopped feeling like I did something wrong and missed some existential bus I was supposed to be on in 1984. Today I shrug, not in a sad way, but in a fashion of "whatever" - I won't spend any more time on the matter. Now i'm in my early 60s and the days of romance are probably behind me. I find joy from walking, kayaking, painting, travel, family (I never married so I have to live vicariously through my nieces and nephews).
Lost loves are usually lost for some good reason - don't torture yourself.

Am I Just Lazy?
I (21M) am going into my senior year of college. I’ve worked every summer the last three years and been able to make a good amount of money (since I lived at home my first year of college and have gotten full tuition paid for from federal aid and scholarships - so i was fortunate enough to be able to save up). I’m back home for the summer, and need to make some money before I go back to school, but for some reason I can’t find a job that I want to do.
I worked as a general laborer (landscaping and moving mostly), cook in a pizza restaurant, at a library, and as an intern at a museum before, and those jobs were all pretty solid. Now, I look at jobs that I could do this summer and I just dread doing every one of them.
A big reason is i want to be able to lift weights and do cardio 4 days a week and still be able to hang out with people. But the thing is, I haven’t had a job in the three weeks I’ve been back and I really haven’t been super social or done much with other people. So I think deep down I just don’t want to have a job and i’ve gotten lazy as time has gone on. I feel like my outlook has changed a lot too, to where I want my freedom to what I want with my days, but I never really end up doin anything of substance.
I just wanted to get this out there and see if anyone had any advice or can relate.

I (21M) am going into my senior year of college. I’ve worked every summer the last three years and been able to make a good amount of money (since I lived at home my first year of college and have gotten full tuition paid for from federal aid and scholarships - so i was fortunate enough to be able to save up). I’m back home for the summer, and need to make some money before I go back to school, but for some reason I can’t find a job that I want to do.
I worked as a general laborer (landscaping and moving mostly), cook in a pizza restaurant, at a library, and as an intern at a museum before, and those jobs were all pretty solid. Now, I look at jobs that I could do this summer and I just dread doing every one of them.
A big reason is i want to be able to lift weights and do cardio 4 days a week and still be able to hang out with people. But the thing is, I haven’t had a job in the three weeks I’ve been back and I really haven’t been super social or done much with other people. So I think deep down I just don’t want to have a job and i’ve gotten lazy as time has gone on. In that same vein, I feel like I put too much emphasis on working out when i should be prioritizing making some money. I feel like my outlook has changed a lot too, to where I want my freedom to what I want with my days, but I never really end up doin anything of substance.
I just wanted to get this out there and see if anyone had any advice or can relate.

I (21M) am going into my senior year of college. I’ve worked every summer the last three years and been able to make a good amount of money (since I lived at home my first year of college and have gotten full tuition paid for from federal aid and scholarships - so i was fortunate enough to be able to save up). I’m back home for the summer, and need to make some money before I go back to school, but for some reason I can’t find a job that I want to do.
I worked as a general laborer (landscaping and moving mostly), cook in a pizza restaurant, at a library, and as an intern at a museum before, and those jobs were all pretty solid. Now, I look at jobs that I could do this summer and I just dread doing every one of them.
A big reason is i want to be able to lift weights and do cardio 4 days a week and still be able to hang out with people. But the thing is, I haven’t had a job in the three weeks I’ve been back and I really haven’t been super social or done much with other people. So I think deep down I just don’t want to have a job and i’ve gotten lazy as time has gone on. I feel like my outlook has changed a lot too, to where I want my freedom to what I want with my days, but I never really end up doin anything of substance.
I just wanted to get this out there and see if anyone had any advice or can relate.

I plan to become a parent someday soonish (I'm 28 now), but I'm not sure about raising my child while their grandma is conservative, homophobic, sexist, strictly religious, etc. I don't want my kid growing up around someone like that at home. My parenting style is different than my mom. The thing is that it's hard for me to kick my mom out of my place since she cared for me all my life regarding my health conditions and now I feel like caring for her too. I don't plan to take her to a senior living/nursing home since I'm afraid they'll be abusive. Also, since I'm her only daughter, it is viewed that the daughter cares for the mother, while her sons live on their own and etc. It isn't fair but I don't have the heart to kick her out or take her to an abusive care. I thought it would be nice of her to help babysit but then as the child gets older it'll be hard to raise the child when she's around. For example, if my child dresses more "like a boy" or "like a girl" my mom would tell my child to change their clothes based on their gender. I haven't come out to my mom since she is clearly homophobic. My dream is to become a parent someday and I don't want the way my mom is to stop me from starting a family of my own. I want my kid(s) to have the freedom to be happily themselves whoever they want to be, dress how they comfortably want and etc.
Please provide any advice! Thank you

Hi there,
I've had some success in the past reaching out on here to meet people to game with; however, they generally fizzle out. Yet, here I am again!
TL;DR Bullet points
- Name: Sage (Gamer name)
- Age: 32
- Location: Northern SoCal
- Education: BA in Geology; Religious studies. MS in Counseling.
- Job: Higher Education/PhD Student
- Hobbies: PC gaming, horror movies, youtube, starting to get into anime, theatre (on- and off-stage).
- ISO: Looking generally for another guy who has similar interests or charisma to add to my introverted sensibilities. gay AF.
--
Hi there, I go by Sage. I'm 32 and live in the super south Central Valley/super north SoCal area. I've been working in Higher Education for about a decade now and am senior management at a university. I'm currently working on my PhD in Education. I'm pretty run of the mill in my opinion. I enjoy PC gaming, horror movies, YouTube videos, and recently started looking into anime. I'm on season 2 of RWBY currently.
I'm ideally looking for someone to spend time with playing games or just co-existing, talking about our days or things in general. I am gay; however, that's not a requirement of who reaches out.
I would like to note that I'm not here to talk to straight guys looking to *experiment*. I don't have much interest in helping you in that way. Please only reach out if you have a genuine interest in connecting and talking/chatting.
Hope to talk soon! :)

Obligated English is not my first language so please bear with me.
Me and my friend Jane have been friends for over a decade, but it wasn't until a few years ago that we started to become really close, even though we have lived in different cities for like 8 years.
For context, when we met she was in an abusive relationship and wouldn't really open up to me that much because when she did I told her she should leave him. A few years later she finally dumped him but soon after she got involved with another man who was also her senior for over 10 years and was also abusive.
I also had bad experiences with men so it got to a point where we were both single and wanted nothing to do with men. That's when we became really close, talking almost all day everyday, video chatting regularly and stuff. I always knew she was kinda moody and honestly a little bitchy but somehow didn't expect her to be like that with me because well, we were supposed to be friends.
But apparently that didn't stop her. She always insisted in spending together the most time we can when we're on the same city and I just felt obliged everytime. But almost everytime she would make comments that annoyed me. For example, in my family house we had problems with a cat that wouldn't use the litter box and pee everywhere instead. We were there (she auto invited herself) and I was talking about how my mom is obsessed with cleaning so much that the house doesn't even smell like cat pee, to which she responded "well, it smells a little". Maybe it was true but I saw no need whatsoever to make a comment like that.
I explained to her as we were getting closer as friends that I've had experiences with girls trying to copycat me and I didn't like that because it didn't stem from a place of love or admiration but from competition. She blatantly denied it yet I think this is exactly what she does. Everything I like she turns it into her personality. A few months ago she started making comments like "at least I did (thing I also wanted to do) before I was 30". At first when I asked her what is wrong with not doing X by any age and she just played dumb. She did it again later and I got mad and then she said she wasn't thinking about me but her own ideal timeline.
I got into a long distance relationship a year ago and my boyfriend lives in the same city as her. When I was going there to meet him I told her I was visiting, but she didn't know about my boyfriend yet (I wanted to wait until I met him irl to talk about him to my friends) and when I told her the reason I was going she broke down and trust me, no boyfriend of mine had ever thrown such a tantrum to me. She basically ruined my trip because she demanded I spend time with her instead of with my boyfriend (who btw was paying for my entire trip). It was really awkward and I didn't even wanted my boyfriend (who is the most awesome man on earth) to meet her because I feared she was gonna be a complete bitch to him. I don't need to say she's been on a "playful" competition with him now. There are more things but this would become too long.
Anyway the last straw was when she got deeeep into skincare and would start lecturing me about it at every chance. I really couldn't care less about skincare and even less when it comes from a person who thinks she's better because of it. I explicitly told her one day (out of the blue) I didn't want to touch that subject with her because she becomes really annoying, and she got really offended, saying I was cornering her saying that out of the blue, that it wasn't true that she made comments like that. That's when I told her about the milestones issue and she apologized and recognized it was true she was only thinking about herself when she made those comments and that she would do better.
A few days after we were video chatting and having drinks and it was getting late and I wanted to remove my make up without waiting until we ended the call, so I reluctantly removed my make up on camera thinking she was going to keep her word. But she said something along the lines of "look, I'm not going to say anything about the way you removed your make up just now, but..". I didn't say anything in that moment but the day after it hit me and I became really really angry, to the point I went no contact with her. After two days I sent her a voice message stating the reason for my anger, and she just apologized and said she tried to make fun of herself but it didn't come out that way, that she was drunk and what not. I haven't replied since.
Part of me thinks this is enough reason to cut contact but it is also true that she has been a supportive friend otherwise. I struggled for a while with no job and she would tell me she could help me any time. Though she wanted me to explicitly ask her for help so I never did, I only ever asked for like a $20 and paid her back as soon as I could. Also she would promise things like paying for my trip to visit her when I had no money (when my bf did it instead) but never actually did, and got mad that my boyfriend got me plane tickets when "she could've had", even though it was less than a month left for the trip date and she hadn't even brought up the subject.
I think she's acting towards me like the abusive boyfriends she had, but I know I'm also a flawed person and have my own unlikeable traits. Should I stop talking to her completely? Is there a way to get some distance between us so the friendship is not lost? I'd love to hear your advice. Thank you in advance.

I have posted this on my personal ig a couple years back.
But a short story since everyone is coming out.
Long story short, was slut-shamed for no absolute reasons by some bully seniors and classmates. Instead of protecting me from those bullies, GUESS what my teachers did. Never raised a word at those bully boys who were bullying me, instead turned against me, as I am a girl, and it is all my how I dress, do my light make up, walk or talk, short hair, or as if i was asking for it since I didn't fit into the normal "adakkam ottukkam nalla kutty" girls of the class.
Called me to staff rooms like a criminal several times, asking me inappropriate things (mind it I actually had no bf or not even kissed a dude or anything, BUT they made me question over all those MADE UP cooked stories about me that too was made up by some 9th or 10th grade kids)
There was one particular maths teacher V, she found at most happiness in making comments about me in front of all peers, emotionally bullying me, teasing me, targeting me, taking me to staff rooms to question me, tell me "why do u pluck ur eye brows, I (she) does it to show her husband, why I am doing it, to show whom'. WORST, a teacher asked if I had a relation with guy P (who was like a brother to me), and this maths teacher goes like, "OH HOW CAN GUY P LOVE HER, LOOK AT HER, GUY P WILL ONLY GO FOR BEAUTIFUL GIRLS AND NOT SOMEONE LIKE HER (ME) MIND IT, SHE TOLD ALL THIS JUST INFRONT OF ME, WHICH IS THE ONLY REASON, IM TILL INSECURE ABOUT MY DUSKY FACE, F HER.
My heart went into pieces knowing on annual day, she appointed boys from my class in corners of the school to see IF ANY OUTSIDE BOYS are coming to see me. WTF really B.
The bullies even appointed other school guys (their frds) at MY tuition classes to tease and bully me to a point I stopped going to the tuition. They used to call me CROW (KAKA) pointing my skin color is dark. I went to the school counseller and told her that, and she told me since it is happening outside of the school she cant do nothing.
The teachers could have stopped or helped me escape bullying I faced at school. But instead they joined the bullying and secretly supported the bullies by staying silent.
I ALWAYS SAW THE HAPINESS IN THEIR FACES WHILE BULLYING ME, CALLING ME NAMES, I STILL REMEMBER IT. (the peers) AND FOR THE TEACHERS BULLYNG ME WAS LIKE THIER DAY TIME ENTERTAINMENT AT SCHOOL.
One of the bully a senior (lets call him R) by one grade, he somehow got my number and passed it into a outside guy who plays cricket with him, he called me saying WRONG NUMBER and called again and again and then began friendly with me, stupid me fell for it, I didn't doubt him, SAME STORY U WILL HEAR IN MOVIES, we started flirting and one day he asked for my NUDEs, I ended up not giving since, that same year a girl's leaked video became viral and I used to watch gumrah, webbed and all kind of shows on teen traps, SO I DIDNT GIVE IT, after few months I came to know this senior of mine R appointed this guy to talk to me and get close to me. I WAS LIKE THANK GOD I DIDNT GIVE IT, IT WAS ALL A TRAP BY HIM TO GET MY NUDES, MAY BE BECAUSE, HE WAS SPREADING LIKE WILD FIRE THAT I AM SLU***T AND HE DIDNT HAVE ENOUGH PROOF FOR IT, OR may be just TO F UP LIFE LEAKING IT, either way.
MY THIS SAME SENIOR WAS A PET OF THOSE SCHOOL TEACHERS. COME ON.
And my sanity went away, when the teachers called my parents and grandma to tell how their daughter is called Slu*****t by their classmates. After my teachers told all these cooked up things about me to my parents, they never understands me and started to doubt me and blame me at house, even going around and telling this to my relatives, and the relatives started calling me and giving lectures to me on how to be a GOOD GIRL.
At school and at house and in tuition classes, everywhere I was targeted, NOT EVEN THE GIRL FRIENDS I THOUGHT ARE MY REAL FRIEDNS STAYED WITH ME, ONE OF THEM TOLD ME "I KNOW U ARE A NICE PERSON, BUT IF I KEEP MY FRIENDSHIP WITH U, THE BOYS AND TEACHERS WILL SEE ME AS A BAD GIRL TOOO" THAT BROKE ME, AND I STILL CRY THINKING OF THAT, exact same words. its all in my headdd.
I WAS MAD AND STILL MAD, ONLY COS OF ONE REASON, COS I WAS CALLED A SL****T FOR ABSOLUTE NO REASON, I didnt do anything wrong, I was just a normal happy girl,L WHO WAS BULLYED, DRAGGED INTO UNNECCSARY HATE, I didn't even had a bf at that time, and these boys made lot of dirty stories about me, one of them was "several boys in gang visit my house secretly and I have S with them" IT WAS ALLLLLLL A LIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I WASNT, I AM NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT A SLU*********************** I AM NOT..............I FELT LIKE SCREAMING TO THE WORLD, I AM NOT, I WAS'NT ..................STOPPPPPPPPPPPP, (but I never could)
One fine evening, I over dosed, me being 14/15 and having no idea on medicines, I had like 8-10 paracetamols. after like 15-20mins, I felt nothing really happened, so I went and told that to my grandmom, MY mom despite working in a hospital, SHE TOLD ME TO MY FACE, that she wont take me to hospital to clean my belly as police case will be involved. My grandmom, did something to make me vomit in the washroom for like 15 mins and MADE ME VOMIT MOST OF IT. But health wise, still after 8 years, I live with minor side-effects of that overdose. I don't wanna go into more details, sorry.
But when my dad came to know about it, HE WAS SO MAD AT MY MOM AND ALL for shaming and bullying me for what the teachers lied to them, and TOLD NEVER MENTION THAT THING IN THE HOUSE AGAIN OR HURT ME, my parents began supporting me after that incident, they changed my school after 10th, in the new school I didnt face bullying, but the new tuition classes I went to, i had to face these bullies/and their stares and gossips)
I WAS REALLY AFRAID TO JOIN A COLLEGE IN TVM THINKING THINGS WILL REPEAT AND THESE BULLIES/BOYS ARE ALL CONNECTED LIKE A BIG CHAIN IN TVM, and even heard stories of many girls who lost their life due to similar incidents.I realized I can never escape these losers from tvm, they will keep targeting me until I die, so after 12Th I left the country and now living peacefully abroad and never wanna go back to tvm, hate it that much.
and when I hear people now telling GET OVER IT, ITS PAST, DONT BE MAD AT ur TEACHERS, NO NO NO
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE OR FORGET, even today I have PTSD and anxiety attacks due to what I faced, I will never forget or forgive those faces, my tears matter and if there is karma, it will defiantly get all of them.
Im sure the recent news about an individual who ended her life will be definitely due to these kind of bully teachers and management which suck the life's and soul out of students by torturing them.
BULLYING AT SCHOOLS/COLLEGES BY TEACHERS AND MANAGEMENT NEED TO STOP, U ARE JUST TEACHERS, NOT MORAL POLICING GUNDAS. MIND IT

Less than a week ago a girl from my school called me and told me that my closest friend group, along with some other people, threw a huge party. Now this would not bother me in the slightest, and I had already known there was a groupchat without me in it. I figured I did not need to be invited to everything, so I let it go. That was until she called me
She had told me that they said shitty things about us in the group chat when they decided not to invite us. I read some screenshots. Best friend number 2's boyfriend said that I kill the vibe in every function I go to, and multiple people agreed along with best friend number 2, and my ex (who was actively trying to get me back while this was happening.) It was basically just "yeah theres no way shes coming" the same was pretty much said for the other girl. i dont want to get too much details in here because my friends are active on socials like reddit. but my ex in the groupchat also called me a hoe ass mf and a lot of them agreed.
after i learned this information, what hurt me the most was best friend number 1 and 2's disinterest in talking to me or apologizing. i am a really easy person to get things by. if they would have told me about the party, i would accept not being invited a lot easier. in the group chat they decided on the excuse that best friend number 1's boyfriend was not comfortable with me there (me and him have never gotten along, he is disloyal and he texted me to fight with me in the past) so i would have accepted that easily. The thing is when they did say that, i had already read the groupchat when they decided to say that. it was clearly a lie, they just did not want me there. they added me to a facetime, and instead of apologizing, they asked me how i found out. i just played dumb until the other girl texted them and let them know, because i did not know what to do. 3 of them were confronting me at once. after this call, at this point i was very frustrated and upset, so i left all of our groupchats and blocked them on instagram. i did have a brief interaction with best friend 2, she told me to cut them all off and go be friends with the girls i talk shit on. (we were all giving opinions on some stories and situations the day before this happened, and all girls involved know my opinions.) but i was so mad i told her to go get cheated on again. i blocked her after that. i know that was wrong of me. anyway, i forgot to block best friend number 1's main account on insta (she has two.) a day or so later, she had posted on her spam, saying that it is "crazy" that i had blocked one account and not the other. this post was shared to me by the other girl who wasnt invited's best friend. i felt like it spoke volumes that her best friend was invited, and instantly told us. VS my 2 best friends of four years not telling me, talking behind my back and lying to me. i was so angry i sent best friend number 1 a short paragraph on her instagram. i basically said im mad that she hung out with us the entire year and did us like that, and i was mad at her for lying to me, even though the truth would not have made me so mad. i defended the girl who was not invited in this paragraph, but that was not my main point. my main point was that we were friends for 4 years, and she did this to me. i blocked her on instagram after this.
her response was to send a screenshot of best friend number 2 saying "tell her that other girl who wasnt invited told people that OP faked sexual assault." this shook me to my very core. i was angry, i was sad, but over all i was mortified that my 2 best friends would even think to use this information against me. i had so many questions. like, why hold this information until now if you really cared? yes, the girl i am defending in this situation is fake for saying that about me, but i dont even care. she does not dictate whether or not it happened. i was hurt. i replied back with 5 points, basically the questions i had, telling her id never do this to them (i was not the best friend, i am not perfect, i am hot headed sometimes but i would never ever use assault to get under someones skin) and then told her i wanted to break it off maturely. i blocked her after that. its been nearly a week now.
for some background, i have struggled with depression-like symptoms and diagnosed PTSD, as well as diagnosed OCD, self harm, and ED's for a really long time. when i begin to ruminate on situations, i just cant stop and i have noticed that i have been thrown into a really deep depression. i have no motivation to do anything, and without my friends, i feel as if i have nothing. i am extremely lonely, and i am getting really dark thoughts on what to do about it. i saw that they have already replaced me as well, and i am feeling quite worthless. i know its stupid highschool drama (we will be seniors next year) but i think the mention of my assault made it so much worse. i feel like they never really understood me. i know i can be quite literally impulsive, and maybe even annoying, or too excited, and that makes me feel like i deserved everything they said. i am having some really heavy thoughts about suicide, and this hasnt happened in a really long time.
i just dont know what to do with myself. i need some tips on what to do when youre really depressed and having these thoughts. i did not want to relapse on self harm, but i have come to it a few times already. my trichotillomania (i pull my hair out) has gotten a lot worse, but i am not cutting or burning myself. I find it harder to eat, sleep, or do anything I enjoyed. i am currently in the middle of recovering from bulimia, and with this happening, i am having thoughts that i should start again.
i know i can be stronger than this. i just need some help and tips. i am young and i want to live, i want to escape these thoughts.
thank you for reading

I (21M) just emerged from one of the worst depressions I’ve ever had in my life (lasting 2 months). I deal with BPD and depression, and I acknowledge that my self-esteem isn’t the greatest. During that time, I lost all interest and passion for Music Education which I wanted to study in college. I had recently been accepted into a private university that I worked especially hard to get into that would supply me with an on campus apartment (I was I medicated and struggled in high school, ending with a 2.57 gpa my senior year) I never thought I would be able to get into college after high school, since my grades are so bad and I had been kicked out at 18 from my parents. after receiving that acceptance letter, I was the happiest I had ever been.
Then one day, in the middle of my depression, I decided I no longer wanted to study music education, and sent my (to-be) music professor an email explaining that I was not in the best financial spot with living on my own and that I was struggling with my interest in music education, and ultimately the decision that I was not going to attend this semester. I received no email back and nothing indicating that the university knew about my decision. I kind of regret it, and it would be too late to enroll, but what’s the point of going if I’m not 100% interested in the major. I thought that receiving a teachers salary outweighed how much I had wanted to become a music educator and that my experience wouldn’t be enough for me to be successful.
Now that I have the future on my mind again, one of the passions I’ve had for six years now is Music technology. I’m thinking about becoming an audio engineer, but the university doesn’t offer any similar majors to what I would need. At the same time, I know I won’t know until I try, but I’m worried about applying for other schools since I didn’t make it into a different school with a HIGHER acceptance rate then the private university I was accepted into.
I’m starting to stress out and become dissatisfied with how I’m doing in life. All I wanna do is go to college and get my degree so I can do what I love. I hate that it’s taking this long for things to work out, but I know everyone’s journey is different. Another thing I feel weird about is that I’ll be 22 going into college as a freshmen, and I would need to live on campus to save money. Is that something I should worry about? How do I assure myself I made the right decision? And what should I do next?
I appreciate you for reading


Hey everyone! My foster cat who I got is a senior and I’ve had him for almost two weeks. In the beginning he was pretty sick with a URI and was being kept in one room. He’s been getting MUCH better with antibiotics but has now exhibited some behavior that I’m not super familiar with!
Basically we moved him from a single room into our basement living room with bathroom included. We wanted to give him some more space because he seemed to be getting bored. He has more space and has been getting zoomies and making some random noises that sound like trilling? I brought some toys down to play (all different kinds) but when i pull them out he runs and hides from them. When he starts to meow a lot i will pet him on his head (used to be his fave spot) but he will purr and then start biting me. He has no teeth so it doesn’t hurt but I back off after. I originally thought he didn’t have enough stimulation so I would turn on cat TV for entertainment but he seemed to not like that and start running around meowing/trilling. I’m wondering if now he is just overly stimulated? When I come to visit him downstairs (i have two resident cats that he needs to be quarantined from) I can’t tell what he needs. He has also started acting differently towards my husband than before? Exhibiting this same running around/zoomie meowing behavior.
Has anyone experienced this? I wonder if he is having a hard time acclimating to all of this space and is hypersensitive to noise coming from the shelter.

Hey guys, i'm a motion designer with 1.5 years of experience, i also had previous experience in other areas, 2 years as a video editor and 2 years as a graphic designer.
So i built this site as a portfolio and now i'm working on my reel, just wanted to have some more opinions on my portfolio in general.
Most of my work comes from the company i currently work for, so it have a lot of videos with the same brand, and since they're videos for products i'm taking it as an opportunity to niche down and specialize on this kind of product videos.
I live in Brazil and my goal is to get clients from here or from abroad, that's why i made it in portuguese and english, even though i still don't have any work in english.
It has a simple design and i'm more worried about the portfolio than in the website itself.
What do you guys think? And does it fits on a junior or senior level?
Thanks in advance!
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portfolio: Motion Design Rodrigo Wang